I might just pee my pants (a.k.a. risk taking)

Summer 1993:   I was at a water park, first time as a grown-up.  My date’s idea.  Sounds fun, huh?!  Well, I didn’t want to be there.  I had packed all the gear I needed, but I was still in my street clothes and being highly uncooperative.  Finally I changed into my swimsuit, and we continued to scope the rides.  I kept saying no, no thanks, you go ahead, etc.  My date was being very patient – probably more patient than I would have been had we been, say… doing Nia or Pilates and our roles were reversed.  We rounded a corner and there was a ride with a raft built for two.  I was still diligently resisting, but my date was being beautifully insistent.  I got in and I held on tight, wishing very hard I was anywhere else.  Down the slide we went.

OH. MY. GOSH. How freakin’ fun was that!!!!  The second we landed in the pool at the bottom, I had a mind blowing life changing revelation:   I had been scorchingly afraid!  Even more mind blowing, I realized how fear had been singularly defining my life and my choices.  Until that moment, at the bottom of the slide, I had been completely ignorant how much fear had been strangulating me.  All the risks I’d never taken flooded over me, all the places I hadn’t gone, all the people I didn’t meet:  MY. WHOLE. LIFE.  I was clueless until we hit that water.

Changed my life FOREVER.

Today:   Fear still creeps in… OFTEN (old coping skills die hard).  But now I simply remember how much fun I have when I am willing to take the risk.  I learned VISCERALLY how much anticipation can be so paralyzing while execution can be so liberating.  A few times I have risked and got a big fat FAIL.  But even a big fat FAIL never feels as scary as the anticipation of failing.

I am especially grateful that one of my life changing moments was SO fun!

In the comments below I can’t wait to hear about some big (or not so big) risks you’ve taken and what fun gifts they brought you 🙂

Great love and big risky hugs,


6 thoughts on “I might just pee my pants (a.k.a. risk taking)

  1. When I was six I was with my Mom and my younger brother in Coney Island and my Mom wanted to take us on the Wonder Wheel. well it was huge to me and I was scared. I didn’t want to go on it but I did. my Dad had an irritating habit of always asking us or our friends questions that didn’t have easy answers. That day he asked me what I had learned that day. I told him that if you’re afraid and you try something new you’re not afraid of it anymore.

  2. Love it Joy! I had a similar revelation when I did a bungee jump a few years back. I experienced paralysing fear in anticipation of it… terrifying dreams, anxiety etc, but I really wanted to do it. When it actually came to jumping it was easy (well, relatively easy in comparison to the fear I experienced in the lead up) Basically, it went like this. 3, 2, bend your knees, jump. Just like that. No hanging about. Swiftly followed by “oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, I am going to die! This is it!” and then “oh, I am not dying, this is actually kinda thrilling” and “aaaah!, it’s over :(”
    Point is, all that wasted time being scared of doing something that actually turned out to be fun. I use this lesson now with myself and clients. Fear is a waste of energy, energy you can put to way better use on something else. And when the time comes to face that fear, count yourself in: 3, 2, 1, JUMP

  3. I learned from my friend, Joy Brown, that listening to and following the music in my soul might feel risky at times but it’s worth peeing my pants for. I listened to Joy today and took a risk with an idea I had for a client’s session. The result was phenomenal! This occurred the same day i had an amazing Pilates session with Joy that created a great deal of expansion in my body.

    Life-changing. That’s Joy!

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